What are emotions? Can we control them? A better word than “control” is “school.” Can we “school” our emotions? In this article let’s just focus on what emotions are. Here is a good definition:
“An emotion is a response to our understanding of the situation. Emotions are triggered by particular beliefs. Each emotion is a particular response to a certain kind of judgment. So, emotions are responses to previous value judgments. “
While all the right words are in this definition, I’m not sure if it makes the point. Let’s talk through an example to try and clarify our thoughts on this.
Let’s assume you are in China and you don’t speak Mandarin. Someone comes up to you and calmly says in Mandarin, “I hate your guts. Your mother is a whore. You are the ugliest and dumbest thing that every crawled the earth. I hope to kill your kids someday.” More than likely you would smile back, bow and try to express your gratitude. You are touched by how appreciative that his person went out of his way and wanted to talk with you.
So, in this situation, why didn’t you get upset? If you were told this in English would you be ticked off? I would. Why? An emotion is triggered by how we interpret a situation. You assumed the best in the example above. You weren’t upset. The point here is that our emotions are outcomes of how we choose to interpret a situation.
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